I have a joint hyper mobility syndrome called Ehlars Danlos.

I have had it all my life, and have spent my life dismissing and working around the anomalies of the syndrome.
Things like getting on and off a bike, horse, over a wall, any movement of my hips in a ‘frog legs’ style position, including intercourse, causes me pain, and sometimes complete hip-joint dysfunction.
I sprain joints, particularly my ankles, like other people chip nail polish.
I am bio mechanically designed to be a klutz.
I trip, fall stumble and am generally clumsy, especially in locomotion. One wrong move and down I go.
Oh and it worsens exponentially when I drink alcohol!
I always thought it was odd but accepted it as ‘just me.’ To the point where I had accustomed my life to its many quirks.

1 year ago I was diagnosed with it, albeit a mild form, and since then, so many things have made sense.
Like my fear of heeled shoes.

I have always attributed my complete lack of competence in being able to walk in anything higher than perhaps an inch, especially if it was stilettos, as me being a tomboy and not having experience in my teen years. Apparently not.
A heeled show throws your weight up and forward, stressing your joints.

Put in floppy joints in the person wearing said heels, and “Oops. Over she goes!’

So I have avoided heels like a child avoiding broccoli – even though I know that it is grown up to wear them, unless they have a squared off ‘nanna heel’ I just can’t buy them, let alone wear them.
What has happened now is that I have developed a fascination that is part fear, and part intrigue.
I see a woman confidently striding, STRIDING, down the path, handbag, umbrella and often a child or two in tow and I am in equal parts awe and intimidated by her, and them and the whole display of superhuman powers.

I start expecting her to fly, or dissapparate or something as well.

Add to this that I think that they are uncomfortable and I just hate being in uncomfortable footwear.

So ladies, and those men that I see rocking a set of heels – hats off to you.
This little black duck struggles to walk or waddle – there will be no high heeled striding in this lifetime.
Maybe the next life time I will get ligaments that are less like puppet strings and more like ligaments 🙂