I have never been a bridesmaid.

I have been a bride, once, and I enjoyed that – the wedding was the third attempt at marrying my husband and after so many attempts, and 7 years or trying, we were just happy to get the official stuff done, then have a bit of a party with our mates. But that wedding is a whole other story.

But I have never been a bridesmaid.

I am 36. All of the friends in my life that I would consider myself suitable for the position of bridesmaid for are married, or are happily single, or are not legally allowed to have a wedding/ marriage ceremony in Australia.

I was an attendant at one wedding, in Bali, and let me just tell you that it was one of those stories that you read in a womens magazine. Besides all the drama that surrounded that wedding, the only bridesmaid thing I did was stand at the alter with my husband after we escorted the bride and groom to it. There was none of the stuff you read about, see on Instagram or whatever. None of which detracts from their ceremony, how much we love them, or the honour of being involved in their wedding, but this post is not about them.

I have never done dress fittings, hair trials, champagne before the ceremony, photos.

I am not in anyone’s scrapbooks, on their wall or in their home video with some power ballad as backing music.

I have not given a speech at a ceremony or danced with some bloke, normally a brother of the bride or groom or had a toast made in my honour.


I am not Hailey, but you get the picture.

Apparently it is a rite of passage and I have not done it.

I just wonder if somewhere, there is a tick list against my name, and a big X along side this one, and somehow I will have failed? It just seems like everyone I have spoken too has been a bridesmaid, at least once.

Now, I am not sitting here, pouting and somehow thinking my life is half lived if I haven’t been a bridesmaid, but I am wondering if I am the only one who may well go through a full and thoroughly lived and loving life with no bridesmaid story to tell? I have plenty of friends, who I am really good friends with, some I am godmother to their children, but they either had many a person in front of me on their list of attendants-to-be, or they eloped, or they married when I was pregnant

Hubby has been a best man and a groomsman at a few events, which has left me partner-less and wandering through many a reception until he was ‘off duty’ and could accompany me.
I know, it is a first world problem, but indulge me as I ponder that I have never been a bridesmaid.

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